I loved Sunday mornings growing up because my mom always made something special for breakfast. Something baked. Something gooey. Something so yummy that it screamed "SABBATH!" and "CELEBRATE!" How she did this consistently with three children I do not know, but Saturday was always baking day and I got to be like her last night! Saturday night Jonathan played in a coffee house concert with a couple friends from the seminary. I could not find a babysitter. So Charlie and I sadly kissed him good bye that afternoon and I looked forward to a long lonely evening with just the two of us. I was racking my brain to think what we could do, what would amuse me as much as THIS was amusing him, what could possibly redeem the evening. And right before his bedtime I hit on it.... "CINNAMON ROLLS!" So I quickly pulled out my Domestic Goddess cookbook--it has a divine recipe for Norwegian Cinnamon Buns--and Charlie and I threw the ingredients into the mixer. (We thought about adding his foot and fingers several times, but in the end, decided against it. A most prudent decision on his part, I think.)
While the dough rose, Charlie and I nursed, read Hurry Hurry, Clip Clop and a book on wild animals. I sang Jesus Loves Me in the dark and then kissed him soundly and put him in bed.
At which point the real fun began. I love baking!
ps....I may or may not have waited until Sunday to eat one!
We noticed a gas leak Friday and the repair man had to turn our furnace up all the way for an hour or so while he checked the gas lines. It got very hot in our apartment. The result was that our stove got turned off because it needs to be replaced (and it is the weekend) and my little warm-blooded man got to wear his first pair of boxers. Apparently wearing boxers inspires him to cuddle!
Charlie has a friend named Nathan. His mom, Ashley and I get them together for 'play dates', but our babies haven't really played with each other and it has been more about spending time with another mom until recently. In the past month or so, Charlie's interest in other children has really grown. He and Nathan even appeared to have a conversation while leaning on the coffee table next to each other at Charlie's birthday party. Yesterday we spent about an hour and a half together yesterday, and Nathan and Charlie had the the most amusing little fight over a book. I think Charlie started it with a little push,
After which, Nathan left, taking the book with him! No big deal really. It was all over in about 2 seconds and it was so funny to see them getting all huffy with each other! And so exciting, on another level, to see them actually engage each other.
But it was also a wake up call. My baby is turning into a little boy. He is growing up into having opinions, desires, and preferences. And he can't, shouldn't, always have what he wants. I'm going to have to start holding Charlie accountable for his actions. Which means discipline. Which frankly, scares me. It scares me because I am so imperfect. It scares me because, out of some weird mothering instinct, I find myself already making excuses for him, reasons to not hold him accountable for his actions.
I'm the sort of person that needs to have a really good reason to do something unpleasant. And I've spent the last year pleasing Charlie by feeding him when he's hungry and changing his diaper when it's dirty and uncomfortable. I know in my mind that discipline is an equally valid way to love my son. Yet somehow, in the moment, I falter because it will make him so unhappy. I need a clearer, more convicting vision for how and why I discipline.
I'm beginning to sift through my understanding, with God's help, so that I can love Charlie better this way. Here's where I was hoping you could help. Anyone have any good books or tips on thoughtful, loving and Godly discipline? Or any stories of eye-opening disciplining experiences? Why do you discipline? What convinces you to do it when it is hard? Please comment!
We are really into books now. Often (I should say, especially) when I am trying to wash the dishes or do something else "productive" in the kitchen, Charlie will carry a book out to me and hold it up to me for me to read to him. And because I love books myself, and understand the need, I usually drop what I'm doing and sit down to read it with him.
He loves the characters. He makes the hand sign for things he recognizes--like hats and flowers, lights and balloons, and mother birds feeding their chicks. He makes the noises for monkeys and dogs. And sometimes he just turns the pages as fast as he can. One of his favorites lately is a book that has picture of his grandparents and great-grandparents in it. He reads it to himself even when I'm not there. (Have I mentioned that everything is "dada" or "zada" or a whispered "ta" these days? It is quite amusing.)
And like every good man, he even reads it on the can.....(well his version of it anyway!)
The wonder of prepositions busy our little man from wake to sleep. His unfolding work is full of "under" and "in," "on" and "over."
Like an industrious scientist, under his progressing hairline, he conceives of experiments that can be carried out on the objects of his world.
When I drop Little Bear into the laundry hamper where does he go? Does he fall IN? Can I reach him? Can I get him OUT? Will I fit IN the hamper? Now that he is OUT should I put him IN again?
I truly never knew there was so much to learn. But, from the way he determinedly puts each object through its paces, apparently there is and he knows it and is not wasting any time about it! Whew, he makes me tired just watching! No wonder he needs two naps a day!
The help around here is fabulous, I must say. I have a big man to make me coffee every morning and a little man to help me with dinner every night. And between the two of them, their antics and fun, I cannot stop laughing. (P.S. Grilled cheese sandwiches never tasted better than when they have sat beside little toes on the counter for a while!)
I have been knitting up a storm for my new little friend, Zoe Margaret Beckman. Her mama commissioned me to set her up in style. I haven't met her yet but I happen to know she's going to have the option of warming her toes in several different shades of pink.... and a fancy fairy hat to keep her cheeks rosy. I've been knitting while Charlie takes his naps. In our cozy blue chair, with my cup of coffee or tea beside me and Howl's Moving Castle on CD from the library to listen to, I often feel like I'm marinating in contentment. I'd almost forgotten what joy it gives me to make things!
