Charlie’s proverbs and witticisms

Here are some wise and useful words from our two-and-a-half year old: 

“Sometimes it is hard to talk when you have a big amount of apple in your mouth”

“When you walk in the rain, you get wet.”  (Looking up at me through wet eyelashes, while dragging his umbrella behind him)  “Yeah, that’s how it woaks, Mama!”

“I not food, Dada, food is food!  Food is foooood!”  (This phrase made its screeching debut when being chased by Dada, who was pretending to be hungry for different parts of Charlie’s body.  It has since been adopted by the adults in residence because of its pith, irony and overall veracity. )

“Let I do it” (The grammatical charm of this phrase is wearing off as quickly as we approach 3!)

“What’s this/that is?”  (Tricky conjunctions aside, Charlie is a boy who knows he wants to know what he doesn’t know.  He is the master of noticing what he doesn’t have a name for, whether it be an aberration in a book illustration or a beetle on the sidewalk.  This is our version of the dreaded ‘why’ question and it makes it appearance about 978 times a day.)

“When you eat chokwat, your mouth gets chokwaty.”  (What more need be said?  I do believe a ‘chokwaty’ mouth is one of life’s true joys!  Amen?)

“Excuse me, I have a word!  I have a word to say to you.”  (This phrase is the result of a failed attempt on my part to get him to not interrupt our conversations.  It was meant to be said once.  In practice, however, it is repeated at increasing levels of volume until the adult conversation has also crescendo-ed  to such an extent that we finally notice that we are all yelling to be heard and cease.  At which point Charlie then says calmly, sweetly even,  into the silence, “Excuse me, I have a word, Mama/Dada!”)

“You say the wrong word, Mama!” (This sentence is very handy when you live with the sleep-deprived mother of your baby sister. It is especially useful in dicey situations demanding obedience--when, for instance, she has just commanded you to put your leg into your shoes, or asked you take off your pants when all you have on are shorts.